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Writer's pictureJeff Eaker

Ode to Unfortunate Truth


Think big.

Think fast.

Think outside the box.

Even though you live in a box and you work in a box, on a box, at a job that you drove to inside of a box after sleeping 8 hours on top of a box.

Actually, boxes are pretty fucking cool.

Still. You should think outside of them.


Make a difference.

Make something special.

Make enough for everyone.

Make a change.

Make it matter.

Make the world a better place.

And be prepared for people to get really pissed off about it.

Get ready to have your ass handed to you by anyone within ass-handing distance.

There’s an entire gene pool full of people out there whose soul mission in life is to shut that kind of shit down before it can even get started.

You want to make something?

Get yourself some Legos.


Be a winner.

Be the best.

Be all you can be.

Be number one.

But realize that even if you’re number one, you’re still just a number.

And so too are your days of being number one.

Enjoy it while it lasts.

History is filled with number ones.

A lot of them turned out to be assholes.


Stay positive.

Don’t be a downer.

Walk on the sunny side of the street.

See the glass half full.

But don’t kid yourself.

It’s still half a glass and everyone else’s is filled to the fucking rim and posted daily on their social media.

Stay thirsty my friend.


Fight for what you believe in.

Fight for every inch.

Fight for what counts.

Fight for your ideas.

Fight for your right to party.

Be a fighter.

But be super nice about it.

Don’t raise your voice.

Don’t make other people uncomfortable.

Don’t cause trouble.

Don’t hurt anyone’s feelings and don’t rock the boat.

Fight the urge to fight.


Follow your dreams.

Reach for the stars.

Do what you’re passionate about.

Do what you love.

Do what makes you happy.

Do what brings you the most joy.

Until you have kids.

And then do whatever it takes to pay the rent.

Kids cost money.

Your kid’s friends will all have parents who have more of it than you.

They won’t learn to be thankful for what they’ve got.

They’ll learn that doing what you love doesn’t always pay so well and finance is where the real dollars are.


Show them what you’re made of.

Show them your dedication.

Show them your loyalty.

Show them you’re a team player.

Don’t expect it to pay off.

Don’t expect anyone to notice.

Don’t be surprised when business slows down and they show you the door.


Go for the gold.

Go the extra mile.

Go hard or go home.

Go to school.

Go to work.

Go pick up the kids.

Go fix dinner.

Go do laundry.

Go take out the trash.

Go to bed for a few hours and then wake up in the morning and go do it all over again.

Every day.

For the rest of your life.

Without going nuts.

Go get ‘em tiger.


Care too much.

Hug too tightly.

Laugh too loud.

Love too deeply.

Smile too often.

Dream too wildly.

Spread too much joy.

Spend too much time with the ones who matter most to you.

Maybe it will work out better for you than it did for me.

Maybe you’ll find a better way to balance it all.

Maybe it will make people love you back.

Maybe it will make your life less of a slog.

Less of a chore.

Less of a grind.

Less of a drag.


Life is precious.

Life is meant to be lived.

Life is to be savored.

Life is beautiful.

Life is a highway and I want to ride it all night long.

Life is unpredictable.

Life is a bitch.

Life is cruel.

Life is hard.

Life is a moment in time and then nobody knows what happens next.

Life is a serious mind fuck.

A lot of people will tell you not to take it so seriously.

Those people will either be insanely rich or dreadfully poor.

Life is funny like that.


Money doesn’t equal happiness.

Money can’t buy love.

Money is the root of all evil.

Money changes everything.

Money makes the world go ‘round.

Money, get back. I’m alright jack, keep your hands off of my stack.


Love is all you need.

Love conquers all.

Love me tender.

Love me do.

Love me with all your heart.

Love me to the moon and back.

Send your love.

Share your love.

Show your love.

Spread the love.

Make love, not war.

Me love you long time.

Love yourself.

Love thy neighbor.

Love is in the air.

Love kills.

The love you take is equal to the love you make.

Paul McCartney wrote that line.

It’s in the last song that all four of the Beatles recorded together.

It’s called:

“The End”.





Thanks for your time.

Thanks for your support.

Thanks for the emails..


Thanks for reading. I'll see you again real soon.










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3 Comments


martinsnews
Sep 30, 2022

You been watching Trainspotting?

Choose life.

Like

cameron day
cameron day
Sep 29, 2022

I love you long time.

Like

theduchess13
Sep 29, 2022

This is highly "Carlin-esque" and I love it. ❤️

Like
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